Something that maybe I ought make a point of remembering every now and then is that, when I share something I do, a practice or a method, a ritual or a technique… just because I explained it and talked about it doesn’t mean I have to do it in a way that matches how I’ve described it for others.
See, I tend to do that. I recall having done that, years ago, with a meditation technique. I described it, wrote it out. And it seemed like my description was haunting me every time I practiced it. For some reason, I feel like I liar if I deviate, because what I said I did isn’t what I did next time around. It’s stupid to constrict myself like this though.
I did the same thing with trimming shrubs. It’s a ritual for me, a spiritual practice of sorts. And I posted about it in my journal at the Order, then it kind of seemed to take the spark away from the act of it. But it wasn’t sharing it that ruined it… it was that I felt I had to live up to the depth of the experience I had described every time thereafter. But nothing says it has to be such a profound experience, or that it has to happen the same way. It ain’t set in stone.