disillusionment

We’re All Selfish

“Genuine selflessness usually lies in the more mundane of actions. Of course giving 10 bucks to a charity is indirectly self-serving, it makes me feel better contributing to the community. However, getting up at 6 AM with the kids so that my mother might get some much needed rest, is not. That’s because I love my mother and I want to make her life a bit easier when I can.”
~Anirac Morgan

And yet…

“That’s because I love my mother and I want to make her life a bit easier when I can.”
~Anirac Morgan

I’m failing to see how it’s not self-centric.

Nothing you can do will ever revolve around someone else.

There’s a difference between being self-absorbed and being self-centered. There’s also a difference between those two things (both categorized hapharzardly by you and Vandor as ‘selfish’) and ‘true selflessness’. The latter is mistakenly believed to be different because of an incomplete awareness. See the above quotes. Self-centric, despite that you’re not focusing on the source of your actions.

We’re all selfish. Recognizing that is just a matter of self awareness.


(Posted in Happiness & Service ♠ a discussion thread at the Force Academy.)

Beyond Redemption

I bet you thought you could save me,
But at some point you’ll see,
It’s a simple one plus two equals three.

Believe what you want,
but eventually,
You’ll have to admit
That this is me.

Get over it.

It doesn’t have to be such a chore,
Just open the door, I’ve Given you the key.

Add up the numbers, just basic math.

I know what you wanted to believe,
But you need to get over it.
I’m lost and it’s past time to grieve.
That lieing to yourself needs to quit,
It’s only been you that you’ve set out to deceive.

My self-abusing, liar loving whore,
Just do the math, open the door.

And walk away.

(Rough Version :: Written ?-?-?)

To Be Among No One

Once you destroy your idols, the images in your heart and mind of the people you used to look up to, there’s a sense of disillusionment, accompanied by a profound feeling of aloneness. It’s the realization that there’s no heroes or villians among us. It leaves us out in the cold, without higher beings to look up to, without hope.

“There’s no drugged-out devils or square-halo angels walking among us.”
– Marilyn Manson, Hey Cruel World…

I say it’s a realization… but that doesn’t have to make it true. I think you can realize something without it stunting your ambitions.

I may walk among no one. But that doesn’t mean those images in my minds eye have to be condemned to die. Rebuilt, frankensteined together, synthesized into something of my own, something just as precious as what it once was; not damned to the fringes of my memories.

I walk among no one because I still aspire to be more than what this world has to offer or ask of me, I still want to be more than what I am. When you realize there are no true gods of man, the road to forging yourself into one is lonely indeed, but I believe its still there.

In any case, I don’t know that you could ever know for sure. Maybe it only feels like being among no one sometimes.